Hey Everyone,
It looks like Pine64 are releasing Pinebook Pro, a laptop that I'm actually willing to pay money for and then use.
https://forum.pine64.org/showthread.php?tid=7093&pid=43850#pid43850
The original Pinebook was better than a US $99 notebook should be. Its graphics drivers were not great, and the screen was a little muddy, but the fit and finish was decent. The big thing, though, was support and updates.