Also on a personal note, you contacted me offlist to chastize me about some trivial comment I made about pulseaudio and at least one other person has named you pubically on this list for the same type of conduct.

I apologize for that.

Apology accepted and my own is offered up to you in return, for my own insensitivities in posting. Sometimes I forget the first rule of digial comment sensibility, wait and think before you hit send.

 

Now you make this post as a maintainership note about why you leave hostile lists. What exactly do you define as hostile behaviour? I'd define it as being trolled offlist by someone who harvested my email and decided they had the right to contact me, just because they could.

Systemd is a thing. Writing publically about a thing, even in criticism, even if you use words you can't say on TV, is so far removed from your own private ad hominem remarks offlist that I am raising your poor conduct, to remind you; just because you post a couple of true facts, that doesn't authenticate a third postulate you have formulated as some sort of gratification index.

I am just going to ignore the last bit. I bring up systemd, because it is quite a bit my baby as well. I take every attack on it personally (rightly or wrongly, and that is my problem, not _yours, as you have quite pointed out later on in your email). Which quite brings to my point, you have folks who are directly impacted by your words. Am I right in defending my baby? Am I right in getting defensive about it? Am I right in not being able to separate out the project from the person? These are all personal questions.

All that matters is, everything people say, has an impact, and a result. You might call it illogical (in your opinion), but it has happened. There have been times where I felt I could participate in discussions and talk about it.

Spectre/Meltdown was one such. I talked about the importance of it, and it was immediately shot down as corporate conspiracy. Of course, we are still dealing with the fallout. What is my relation with this? For the last many months, I have been part of the response force for my employer to deal with the intel flaws. But feeling (note the word) attacked, doesn't make me feel inclined to share. Certainly not my loss.

 I'm not exactly sure what it is that you maintain

I don't actively maintain anything right now. I took time off for mental health reasons. Part of it is physiological, but a lot of was exacerbated by working in open source. That is a different story, and not the topic of this email. If you want, ping me offlist, and I will send you a more detailed email.

Stress is one of the most enduring problems in the modern corporste world. Sorry if I have added to your own at this time. I do appreciate the fact that it takes a particular kind of fortitude to continue to participate under such adverse conditions and I hope you understand my regret is sincere.